Free Between The Lines can be interpreted in many ways – For me, it is connected to writing and words. There is a sense of freedom in between these lines! One fine day, I was writing pen to paper, through tears blurring my eyes. Suddenly the tears blotched and the ink merged a few lines and a thought came by. My freedom or escape from this harsh reality lies between these lines of mine. Between these lines, I am the most me. I don’t care about what the world thinks. Here lies my freedom I need no one’s permission for. For others, it could be anything else. For a bird in a cage – it lies between the lines of the wires of the cage, beyond which is freedom! For a prisoner, it is the bars of the prison and so on!
I hope you can make this your own space and get to know yourself better. I hope you find your joy, your happy moments of sweet distraction or sparks of madness, words of wisdom, epiphanies and inspiration, or motivation and strength to go chase your dreams. I hope you find a friend or a shoulder in me to lean on and cry your heart out through some of my darker pieces.
My dream is to leave a piece of me with each of you and become a tiny part of what makes you – you!
The mighty Mountain stood with her bosom swollen with pride,
But lost when the tiny being conquered her summit line!
The mighty River lived wild and carefree,
But lost to the tiny being when his dams tied her down like a tree!
The mighty Forest was a haven for Nature to flourish,
But lost when the tiny being stripped her naked, to feed his own wish!
The mighty Elephant walked the earth with thunder at its feet,
But lost when the tiny being made her dance in a circus on two feet!
The mighty Lion’s roar echoed through lands far and wild,
But lost when the tiny being put him up for display on a leash by a window side!
Thus, the tiny being went on to reach the top of the pyramid just fine,
But lost when he realised he could not save his own mind!
The tiny being took on the wrath of Nature’s curse,
But lost to the storms brewing inside his own mind’s universe!
The tiny being journeyed to far away lands,
But lost when he forgot the warmth of his own Mother’s hands!
The tiny being tried to comprehend everything on the outside,
But lost to the stranger staring back in the mirror by the bedside!
The tiny being wanted to reverse everything to pre mankind,
What had been an eternity of loss, felt like a fraction of time!
Alas, dots are connected only in retrospect, as life unwinds,
When it finally dawned on him, everything had already changed forever to rewind!
D 🌹
Red for love, passion and desire; for courage and fire.
Red for blood that saves lives, for wars that claim sides.
Red for pain, that makes you feel alive!
Do you see the red in me?
For I am so full of it that my lips will tell you stories of reds that one is yet to discover.
More than 50 shades of red lie within the cracks of my lips.
Will you stay to tell me how many you see?
Will you stay to help them smudge into a colour that reflects my soul in your eyes?
My lips can colour your soul too. Would you taste the poison in them to know what my love feels like?
Do you think you could survive and let our kisses linger in eternity?
Frozen moments of softness while the poison works on you. Hooks you in and starts colouring you atom by atom.
Red.
Will you stay and colour my broken pieces where others left midway?
I promise to hide my maroons and drench you in my pinks.
Maybe I will even become a shade of blue for you even though it is impossible for primaries to do that.
You know, the only time reds turn blue is when wounds deepen. Harder the hits, more hues of blue.
We could create a beautiful mandala by putting back all my pieces, all my reds and all my blues I made for you.
You could spend a lifetime with me and I will show you how red and blue together gives the best hue.
Purple! Only if you promise to not go astray midway.
Change your colour and leave if you must, but while I sleep. Not before leaving my reds by the bedside.
Too many have left with them and I keep seeking them in all the wrong places.
An incomplete mosaic with blurred edges and missing pieces.
A failed art of Van Gogh that forgot to cross over with him.
I am falling short of reds of love to give.
I could scrape the last bits for you if you promise to stay. And if you do, I can do miracles too! I can make something out of nothing, my emptiness itself will create a new red for you.
Stay. Is it too much to ask?
Red… red for bloodshot eyes forever welled up.
For red roses with my name that never reached. Red for blushes stolen and betrayals with hearts broken.
D 🌹
How do you leave someone you love?
You start by breaking yourself into a million pieces, held together by the vestiges of forlorn love.
You keep trying to mend the pieces together hoping to fuse them and heal, but it keeps ripping apart.
Pain shoots across your soul; there is nothing that will douse this burning pyre within.
A flame you desperately try to subdue with hope. Each time hope looks like it is winning and then the razor tipped flames lick and shred every bit of this hope till none is left again.
And you start imploding slowly into a void that is inexplicably heavy, weakness grasps you and you cannot stop spinning.
You keep questioning yourself and cursing yourself and nothing alleviates this pain that seems so deeply embedded, it is now every cell of your body and every breath of your soul.
While you continue to burn and get destroyed at a painstaking pace that seems like an eternity, your mind decays, you welcome dementia like you were waiting for it like your escape pod.
You want to run away into nothingness. You want to embrace solitude that will numb you. Just for a bit, you want to feel nothing.
And then just like that hope cracks in through a tiny crevice and hypnotises you once again.
Makes you believe there is space for one more try, one more attempt, we still have our last ounces of strength left. It teases you to believe again.
Just when you had begun to numb all over, light tears through your nothingness and an icy coolness subdues your pyre.
You wipe away the tears that eroded your soul and try again.
You venture into the world and tell yourself, you will find what you deserve.
You meet happiness once again.
You are wary of the dormant fire within and yet grab on to hope and happiness and stride forth.
Mistake.
One you never learn from. You get slapped hard with reality, you reel in and the world spins all around you.
Now the whole journey backwards is too familiar. You spread open your arms to welcome the raging pyre within, ready to be consumed once and for all.
You let the pain spread its tentacles all over you. You have a weird sense of calm.
There is a strange peace to this pain. This pain seems more comfortable and there is a sense of belongingness to this pain.
The pain is angry with you; you understand. You had abandoned it. You know what it’s like to be stranded.
You caress this pain and you become one with it. It now defines you.
You settle for this eternal pyre that burns within you, this pain that feels closer than anything else, this darkness that envelopes you like a warm fuzzy blanket, a fragmented, fragile and fearless heart in place of love.
You finally find acceptance and love in a hopeless place, from everything that everyone else runs away from.
You find your dark peace and life takes a new meaning.
You have managed to leave someone you love.
D 🌹
An empty heart, yet so heavy
You say you try, yet no heart to it
Forever, eternity, love of my life, my doll
Same words, different chats
I will never leave you became I cannot live without her
Half a decade of everything and some more
One month of her and it all fell short suddenly
There is no spark you say, something doesn’t stir anymore
She gives you everything, now my more than everything is too less
I have you with me, yet she occupies your mind
Your hands hold me, yet your heart yearns for her
You hear my words, begging you to stay
And you can only wait to finish and hear her precious voice
The cigarettes hide the smell of my charring heart well
Yet you can’t stand that she slept hungry
You made love to me, or so I thought
But you couldn’t wait to pack your bags and leave to be with her
I gave everything I could and some more
I was running on empty, made something out of that empty
Put you number one priority, ahead of family and career
Yet you can’t wait to see her cute dimples
What have I done, what have I not done, what can I do more
Questions that plague my diseased mind
I have lost all sanity reading how you talk to her
How you call her everything you called me and some more
Everything you tell her that was once whispered into my ears
I trained you so well to handle a long distance
And now you apply it somewhere else
I wait, with my last shreds of hope scraping at the bottom of empty
Hoping you will pick half a decade over a month
They say, if you have to beg someone to stay,
They have already left a long time ago
I wait, counting, watching my shattered heart break
Piece by piece, one chat message at a time
I wait for the inevitable end.
D 🌹
Keep believing, keep hustling, keep moving
When you hit a wall, find another way.
When you slip and fall, relish the wet mud day.
When the lights go out, light a fire.
When you get lost on your way again, enjoy the view, don’t tire.
When the road steeps uphill, get down on all fours.
When you faint from exhaustion, take a break, breathe some more.
When you get smacked in the face, smile – a wicked smirk.
When you get lonely, make a strong cup of coffee and twerk.
When the tears roll down, enjoy the salty aftertaste.
When old wounds rip open, scream! Don’t let the rage go to waste.
When you get betrayed, hold on to yourself harder.
When the traitors come back, laugh like it is no matter.
Some days when you won’t want to live, just survive.
Some days you will find ways to be excitingly alive.
Keep the hustle on, never give up, keep moving.
When you see no hope, keep believing.
One day when you reach the top, you won’t be dreaming.
D 🌹
Imagine your eyes are closed.
Now travel with me.
Beyond the dreams while you sleep,
beyond the realms of fantasy,
beyond the seams of possibility,
beyond the depths of what’s fathomable,
beyond the limits of understanding,
beyond the contours of time and space as we know it,
beyond life and death and everything in between,
beyond all the hearts of 7 billion put together,
lies my love for you.
Living, breathing, waiting, wrapped inside a cosmic cocoon.
Can you feel it alive?
A nebula that’s made of dead stardust and is ready to birth a new star to reality.
Imagine you are yourself that very living, breathing, waiting, sleeping,
potent Being, stardust full of love.
Now open your eyes slowly and travel all the way back to where you are right now.
Do you feel the power of the universe itself within you?
Now that’s what you call ‘AWAKE’!
Thank you for reading. Random midnight thoughts, again.
D. 🌹
Even from my Nothing, I tried to give you Everything.
And even though you thought you gave me Everything, I received Nothing.
Strangely we kept trying to hold on to Everything,
but were left grasping Nothing.
In the end, our Everything, it was all for Nothing.
– Random 3 am thoughts for an online word prompt competition.
D 🌹
Khwabon ko silkar barson se chaadar odha hai maine,
Taaron ko silkar mere takiya ko sajaya tumne,
Mere khwabon ko aakhir taaron tak pahuncha hi diya tumne!
Mere bistar ko phoolon ke guldaste se sajaya tumne,
Aankhen jab jab band ki toh mere sapno ko mehekaya tumne!
Meri zindagi bin disha ke lehron se jo takrate jhagadte chali aa rahi thi,
Meri zindagi ki naav ko maksat dekar lehron ke saath behena sikhaya tumne!
Doobte sooraj ki tarah jab mere aatma-sammaan ki roshni doob rahi thi,
Zindagi se thhake haare jab ummeed ki saari goonjaish chhoot rahi thi,
Mere sacche himmat, kala, taakat aur hunar ko darshaya tumne,
Us vishaal sagar me apne bal par tairna sikhaya tumne!
Har sukh ko sambhaalna sikhaya tumne,
Har dukh se sambhalna sikhaya tumne,
Har lamhe me doob jana jo sikhaya tumne,
Ab zindagi kuch is tarah jeena aa raha hai mujhe,
Itni khushiyan bhi sach ho sakti hai, aisa vishvas mera banaya tumne!
Kya tumhare bina me reh paaongi? shayad nahi.
Kya tumse jitna pyar kiya phir kisise kar paaongi? shayad nahi.
Aane wale din hamare liye kya laayenge, ye pata nahi,
Par beete din jitne tumhare sang bitaye, unka koi jawaaab nahi!
Aise tumhare pyar ne pagal banaya mujhe, madira ke bin zindagi me khushiyon se jhoolna sikhaya tumne!
D 🌹
Beautiful is my journey that encounters you
Happiness that cannot be hidden, happiness so true.
Cherished are the memories you have gifted me,
The warmth in my heart flows abundantly.
The Spring was beautiful, now the Winter is too
The colours more cheerful, flushed all the blues.
The rains so nostalgic and the smell of the books,
A world within a world, where nobody looks.
A surge of passion, a sense of belongingness
A hidden strength unveiled, sans a harness.
The blind trust entrusted, a sense of reliability
You have reeled me in, in for eternity.
You’ve taken my heart, now take my hand
Make me yours, bejewel me with The band.
Impatient and restless, I long to be yours
Yearning in silence, behind clear doors.
On top of the world, I want to scream your name
Call you mine, declare the flame.
Let them know, we made it fine
Out of the furnace, burnt, but not declined.
We’ve risen from the ashes they set for selfish wants
Chagrined hearts, but nothing daunts.
Painfully we pieced together our broken hearts
We’ve journeyed rivers of sorrow in our own Ark.
So my love, I bring unto you, what you brought unto me
Let the world know, we were meant to be,
Together, forever, indefinitely…
Our Journey….has just begun.
D 🌹
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